Calypso Black Cherry Lemonade

Here's a drink. It doesn't have live bacteria in it, has nearly no vitamins, doesn't make any health claims, and says nowhere on the bottle that anything in it is organic. It only has 10 percent juice, even though it's lemonade. And it has 300 calories a bottle. Frankly, I am looking forward to it more than the last few beverages I've reviewed anyway. Because finally, it's a drink that isn't supposed to "change the way you look at beverages". It's just a drink that looks good, and doesn't try to be anything else. The closest thing to a health benefit on the label is that it has "real lemon bits". Sometimes, Yerba Mate and Fulvic Trace Water  just can't compare to cane sugar and black cherry concentrate. Needless to say, they don't sell this at Whole Foods. Finally, something that will taste good!

Color: It looks like watered down pomegranate juice. This is one of those drinks where the color in the picture above is identical to the color of the actual drink. After all, the bottle isn't colored. It's just thick glass.

Smell: It smells very cherry-y.  Like a fresh jar of maraschino cherries. No lemon smell at all. If you've ever had Dr. Brown's Black Cherry Soda, it smells just like that. Or, if you are reading this in the Mid-Atlantic USA, it smells just like Rita's black cherry water ice.

Taste: It's a really good flavor, I'm just not particularly sure what that flavor actually is. Don't get me wrong, it is great. I guess, the best way to describe it would be as though it was Pacific Cooler Capri-Sun mixed with lemonade. But what's great is that neither flavor overpowers the other. The black cherry is definitely there, but you also get the tartness of the lemon as well. In fact, that's what makes the drink to me, the tart and sour lemon. After all, this is lemonade. It isn't right for lemonade to not be sour at all. (Yeah, I'm talking to you, 2nd graders with lemonade stands.) So overall, it tastes like what it says it is. Black cherry, and lemon. Thank god, there are no veggies or bacteria in this one. The only problem is that I was really looking forward to those lemon bits, and it was really just some lemon pulp remnants. But that's a pretty minor complaint.

Rating: ****

It was definitely interesting, and certainly a great way to counter an 78 degree day. And let's not forget, it wasn't green! How about that? Odds are, you'll have trouble finding this one, but if you spot it on your next grocery trip, pick it up. It's worth trying. Oh, and there's an electric blue flavor too. Bet they don't sell that one at Whole Foods either.

blk. Alkaline Fulvic Trace Mineral Infused Water

So, this is a blog about non-carbonated beverages. (Hope I made that obvious by now.) Traditionally, water is not a beverage. However, judging from the fact that there are five adjectives before the word "water" on the bottle, I think I have permission to review it. (Note that it's still not flavored water.) Now, that doesn't mean I'm particularly excited about it. Fulvic acid comes from plant matter found deep in the earth, and is highly alkaline. I think it's also the stuff that makes up Brita filters as well. So, does that mean it's like a Brita ground into water? Wonderful. The bottle even says this stuff has a pH of 8, which is roughly the same as normal sea water. (Mmm... Atlantic Ocean.)  But more than all of that, I want to make it clear that this is black water. From deep in the earth. Oh, and it's $2.50 for a 16 ounce bottle. You and your outrageous pricing, Whole Foods.

Color: Well, the name of this stuff would tell you it's black. It's not. It is actually a deep, translucent, brown. ( Think soy sauce, or coffee.) Minus points for you, blk. If you are going to call a drink black, it better actually be black.

Smell: When has water ever smelled like anything? The plant matter / fulvic acid / mystery goo doesn't give it an odor. 

Taste: Well, surprisingly enough, this water tastes... kind of like water. (How do I describe the flavor of water? Hydrogen-y? I don't know.) So, it tastes like water, but at the same time, it has this bitter flavor as well. I guess I would describe it as earthy water. It's somewhat metallic, and unlike other waters that say they have minerals, you know this one has minerals. You can taste them. And frankly, that's not a great thing. But I guess if you really feel like you are lacking key minerals, you'd be willing to put up with the taste, which makes me think of tap water in a foreign nation. We all know how that ends up. Honestly, I'm not a big fan. It certainly won't make me stop drinking tap water, or Brita water, or normal bottled water. Sorry, blk. Who told you black water was a good idea?

Rating: ***

Ok, I'll admit, there was no chance I was going to say, "This is the most amazing water ever, we all must ditch the clear stuff and drink this immediately!" Because, frankly, even the best water isn't that different from the worst water. This was really more of a test to see if it was bad. Which it wasn't, it was just a little too mineral-y for me. But if you want attention, I'd imagine walking around and drinking black water isn't a horrible way to do it. Either way, I'm sticking to SmartWater. That's only $2.25 at Whole Foods. What a bargain!